A sexism storm is brewing in the I’m A Celebrity camp after David Haye made a series of bizarre remarks about his girlfriend Sian Osborne. While Haye dubbed it ‘banter’, a woman in an open marriage has called out the boxer for his ‘weird’ outlook on women
A woman in an open marriage has slammed David Haye’s bizarre remarks about his girlfriend as a I’m A Celeb sexism storm brews.
The 45-year-old former boxer has been accused of sexism after making some controversial comments about how women look and their personalities in a clip from the second week of the show. Speaking about his long-term partner Sian Osborne, he stunned campmates by telling them: “She’s tall, blue eyes. She’s lovely. She’s got the personality of a proper ugly bird.”
Shocked Scarlett Moffatt replied: “You can’t say that” before David brushed her off, adding: “She has. Most ugly girls realise they don’t they’re not pretty enough to….they gotta have a personality to banter and to tell jokes and s**t, so people overlook the fact that they’re not aesthetically amazing, straight away.”
“Which is what’s called Ugly Duckling syndrome, where girls are ugly, when they start off, and then they and then they kind of they, they get pretty as they get older. But they still got the personality of when they’re ugly. Does that make sense?”
READ MORE: David Haye sparks I’m A Celebrity sexism storm with ‘ugly girls’ commentsHe has been in a relationship with model Sian since 2020, but over recent years he’s also been linked to Saturdays singer Una Healy and actress Helen Flanagan. According to sources, the couple used the exclusive dating app Raya to specifically look for a third person to join them. Their profile reportedly made it clear they were a “packaged deal,” seeking a woman who could fit into their established ‘throuple’ dynamic.
The one-time heavyweight champion is non-monogamous which is when someone has multiple romantic and sexual relationships, with the consent of a partner or spouse. According to one ex, “one woman will never be enough” for him.
Now, Su Perez, 46, who has been in an open marriage with husband Chu Nim, 39, for seven years, has reacted to David’s eye-popping comments while telling the Mirror how the couple with other people while still putting each other first.
London-based parents Su and Chu met on the dancefloor of the Liquid & Envy nightclub in Romford, Essex, in 2008. Now they juggle kids, work, sex parties and throuples…together. Chu told the Mirror : “One night we were out, really drunk, and a friend stayed over. We were like ‘Should we bring this person in?’ Obviously, it was very scary at the time. The funny thing was we hadn’t even spoken to this person, they were oblivious.”
According to Chu, everyone was in the bedroom when he suddenly asked their friend if he wanted to sleep with his wife. “They didn’t think it was real until we made it real,” he said.
Su added: “It was just me getting involved. There was no sexual connection between the two men, it was just me with them. It went really well. The morning was awkward, he went out and brought us breakfast! But it didn’t change anything about us or our friendship.”
Now, seven years into opening their marriage, Su says that boundaries and making eachother feel sexy, seen and put first – even when sleeping with a third person – is vital to making it work.
Reacting to Haye’s comments about his partner, Su told us: “I’m sadly not surprised by those comments, not because of him but just in general because of how society views women. But what is ‘ugly’? That’s the problem. What’s ugly to me might not be ugly to you and vice versa. So I think that’s the problem with those comments. He catches heat with women for that because what is an ‘ugly’ person’s personality? That’s just weird.”
Su, who is a mum, also asks: “Would he be comfortable with his daughter hearing these comments? And what advice would he give to his kids if they were in a similar situation? Because we think we know everything until our young ones have to go through something.”
After hitting it off years earlier during their first stint on I’m a Celebrity back in 2012, Helen Flanagan was romantically involved David throughout 2023 before their split in December that year. Speculation swirled that she formed a “throuple” with David and his girlfriend Sian, but she has firmly dismissed this. But during a chat on Celebs Go Dating, the Corrie star spoke about Haye and the baggage that comes with dating the gold medal-winning former fighter.
Helen became emotional as she revealed they had once been an item, but struggled with the thought of not being the only woman in his life. “I’d known him for 10 years,” Helen said on the show. “We did a reality show together. I remember the first time seeing him in the jungle, I was like ‘wow.’ It was quite something – it’s really hard for me to talk about. He had a girlfriend and an open relationship. I didn’t mean to fall in love with him, but I did. We did have this amazing connection together – we were like fire. It was weird – I think he does love his girlfriend, and he loves me as well. It just brings me to a part in my life that was quite dark.”
After being quizzed about claims she was in a throuple, she said: “No [it wasn’t]. I was in love with him. I wouldn’t have enjoyed watching the man I was in love with have sex with another woman; that’s not for me. I had communication with his girlfriend, but I felt very guilty. I didn’t feel nice about it all. It really upsets me because I don’t mean to hurt other people, but I was just really lonely. I found it really difficult because it just happened. It’s not nice to another girl, and I should’ve known better.”
Reacting to Helen’s claims, Su said: ” Some people would rather have half [a relationship] when they can’t have the full, but others realise they can’t accept half because it’s too much. It’s fully understandable. The problem is developing feelings. When it comes to sex it’s just sex, feelings are a whole different ball-game. I would not like to share my husband if he had feelings for someone else.
“I think David needs to know what he wants, because not everybody can have all the cake and eat it at once. That’s potentially where he’s going wrong because this is not a one-sided thing, he needs to be very clear with what he wants and find someone that matches that. And unfortunately it’s not easy to find.”
The couple, whose first sexual experience as a throuple was in 2018, generally sleep with another woman. When they involve another man, he makes love to Su, but not to Chu. “Chu always says he just likes me enjoying myself and having pleasure. He doesn’t get involved, but it works for us,” Su explained.
In a practice known as “unicorn hunting” – when a usually heterosexual couple seeks a third and generally bisexual female partner to join a threesome – they normally involve a woman.
Explaining their three-way set-up, Su revealed: “It sounds brutal but when it comes to opening your marriage as a couple, it’s no different than using a sex prop – even though you don’t approach it like that. The other person has got feelings and those have to be accounted for. But in terms of what it means to us, it’s purely sexual. But you do have to be very careful because it’s not for everybody and the other person can catch feelings. So you have to be very aware of that.
“We’ve been together for 17 years but it’s not something that we’ve done since the beginning. These things take building a foundation, a deep relationship and deep understanding. I never thought I’d be here.
Despite their unconventional marriage, their courtship was fairly standard, with Su saying of their first meeting: “I don’t believe in love at first sight, but I do believe something happened. Then we just kept bumping into each other and we moved quickly. We became friends really quickly and I think that’s the basis of any relationship – we’re best friends.”
The pair held a Chinese marriage service in 2011, the day before Valentine’s Day, attended by friends and family. They then officially registered their nuptials in 2022, after marrying again in Las Vegas.
For several years they were quite traditional, with Su making Chu promise not to visit any strip clubs in Amsterdam on his stag do. She said: “I literally said ‘I only have one condition – do not go to the strip clubs.’ The way I saw it was that if you’ve found the one, I should be the one forever. You shouldn’t even need to look anywhere else.”
When Chu was “dragged” to a sex show – but not a strip club – on his stag night, Su threatened to call off their big day, before cooling down. But everything changed two years later when they started visiting Miami for work. Su explained: “The sex culture there is very big – especially in the clubs. One of the first nights, we went with some friends to a strip club and I remember saying ‘Enjoy yourself but respect me.'”
Chu added: “Su made it really clear to me from the get-go and I really understood. It’s not about the girls, it’s about how I make her feel in that scenario. We can be very comfortable and say ‘that girl is beautiful’ or ‘that man looks amazing’, but you need to have a foundation of understanding.”
On one Miami trip, the pair shared a private lap dance and “the penny dropped”, for Su, as she watched her husband’s reaction. “It was very sensual,” she said. “I enjoyed watching him enjoy it, and he enjoyed me enjoying it. And it progressed to us fantasising about situations.”
Looking back at that fateful night night in Miami, Chu added: “There was lots of discussion – ‘is it just a fantasy, do we want to make it real?'”
Explaining how the couple eventually opened up their marriage, Su added: “It’s not like it is in the movies – for us it’s just something that gradually happened. We like to go out. We have fun. We go to venues, go to clubs, sometimes things just flow and before you know it you’re at a strip club and it’s quite raunchy and sexy and you realise it’s something you’re both into. And that’s how it progresses. It starts with a fantasy. You don’t just say it out of the blue. And you have to be really comfortable in yourself as an individual to do it.”
And when they eventually invited a woman to join them, Su says there was a “completely different dynamic” in the bedroom. “The first time, it was just me, but the second time we were both involved.”
Watching Chu make love to another woman didn’t make her jealous. The extra-marital activity bonds them more than threatening their relationship, according to Su, who adds: “It brings you closer together. You enjoy each other in a very different way.”
Meanwhile, Chu admits that enjoying intimacy with two women is “amazing.” He said: “If someone does something wrong, we sit down and we make sure it doesn’t happen again. Obviously, boundaries can be blurred, especially in the heat of the moment, as there’s a different part of the brain making decisions.”
The couple prefer to meet people naturally rather than at sex parties, where, according to Su, it can feel a bit like ‘herding cattle’. “I find it easier to be in a bar or club where you’re just flowing to the music and the next thing you know you’re just dancing with someone rather than being in a venue where you already know what you’re there for. That just feels a bit more forced. We like a more natural environment.
And it’s not always just sex. “Sometimes you just have a connection with someone at a bar and it doesn’t go any further, we just have a couple of snogs like teenagers.”
Away from their unorthodox sex life, the couple look after their son and Su’s daughter from a previous relationship. She is disabled and Su is her carer, as well as being an events manager, while Chu is a manager at a private jet business.
The couple’s open marriage has never progressed any further than casual throupling – but they have got close. Su says: “There’s been a couple of people that have been a little bit more regular in our life, but not a permanent situation. We don’t go out chasing it as such. But you get comfortable with regular people.
“One person made us questioned becoming a throuple once because we were very comfortable with them and it flowed really well without anything sexual even happening. It just felt like a very nice connection. But we realised we are very happy with us as we are. And it becomes a whole different level of emotions when you have a third person in your marriage that we’re just not ready for.
Jealousy is often the first hurdle when it comes to making non-monogamy work. But Su and Chu insist opening up their marriage has only brought them closer.
Revealing the secret to a happy throuple, Su tells us: “It always has to be about each other. You can be with someone else sexually, that’s fine, but we are both the centre of each other’s lives. You can be into it, but I’m the number one and he’s the number one. It’s a respect thing. It sounds weird – how can you respect your partner when sleeping with someone else? But it is that.”
She added: “If one of us is uncomfortable in any way then you just call it. We both have to still feel that we are the center of that other person’s attention without neglecting someone else because you don’t want someone to feel like a piece of meat either.
“The people we sleep with understand that we are a couple. There’s always going to be a deeper connection between those people. Sometimes the desire to sleep with someone else comes and goes because you don’t feel well within yourself and you don’t want to do it because you feel insecure, but that’s got nothing to do with your partner.
“Nobody wants to feel like the third wheel either. If he’s talking to a girl and he’s bringing that girl to me without talking to me, then it’s not us making a decision together. It’s like they are coming to me and I’m the third. So we have boundaries on that.”
Despite their openness, they do exercise caution when talking to other people about their open marriage. Chu says: “If people ask, I’ll never lie, but I’m not mentioning it in the office.”
Similarly, they don’t advertise their unconventional sex life to their children – although they say they will answer age-appropriate questions if asked. The pair also discovered that some of their closest friends of 20 years are swingers, which helps.
Su reveals her family doesn’t know about her open marriage. “They don’t live in this country and they don’t know. They probably wouldn’t understand it.”
She added: “It’s not something that we just bring up. It’s an intimate thing between us. It’s not a secret, but we just do what makes us happy and it’s nobody else’s business.”
For Su and Chu, the most important parts of an open marriage are communication, boundaries and confidence. “The moment that communication is not clear, that’s when feelings get hurt. It could be very casual but you could feel like you’re not getting any attention,” Su said.
“The other person has to vocalise that too. Set your boundaries and expectations. Eventually. It becomes quite natural, because you already speak about that. But it doesn’t hurt to always have a conversation.”
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